In the end, what does casual sex mean? It comes down to those risks. If you’re meeting someone in a bar, that’s one thing. If you’re hooking up in a hotel, that’s another — and a situation where any potential consequences are manageable. Each situation warrants its own exploration, and should be approached with proper caution, but more on that in a minute. For all of you “awkward” hookup lovers out there, here’s what you need to know.
Does casual sex damage your self-esteem?
Your situation can be totally different than mine. While casual hookups can absolutely spark jealousy and insecurity, they can also be liberating. I’m a sex worker, so I’ve been in a ton of different contexts. I’ve made friends and dated with people in long-term, I’ve been in random, one-night flings, and even I’ve been in serious relationships. As my different experiences have revealed, each has been slightly different, but never to the point that it makes me feel betrayed or one-dimensional. In fact, the more I learn about myself, the more I try to embrace my sexual desires, experiences, and preferences and accept myself.
Sex is a part of life, and casual sex is merely a facet of that. If you think you might have a struggle with casual sex, you’re not alone, but there’s an entire community dedicated to casual sex and greater good. If you want to try dating with a stranger, but you’re scared you might sleep with someone you don’t truly want to date, the Dating Sites For Fits section will help you learn what type of expectations you have to set in order to feel safe and confident.
1-4% of people will have a higher-risk behavior, and if you’re not careful, sex can ruin your relationships and ruin your life. Choosing who to sleep with is difficult; here’s how to know if you’re at risk.
What do I need to know about casual sex?
If you’re going to have casual sex, you’ll have to determine if you like the person you’re with enough to date them. Casual sex isn’t just strictly for hookups, but hey, who cares if you date or not! While casual sex is one of the fastest growing forms of dating and relationships, it still has a stigma. Not only is casual sex hard to define, but it’s something that can be approached differently in each situation. People date for different reasons
Sexual health expert Shona Robertson says most sexual problems in people aren’t a lack of desire, but rather problems with communication and chemistry. The goal with casual sex should be to create an opportunity to share your interests and flirt with new people — not really focus on having your cake and eating it too. While sexual orientation or gender identity are far less common in a relationship, they can absolutely factor in what are typically casual relationships. That means you might find a match that falls into either realm; it’s important to keep the risks in mind. The United States is a sexually progressive society that has been rightfully lauded for its advances in sexual education and use of birth control. What I want to take aim at, however, is another aspect that has become ingrained in our psyche — namely the casual hookup. Casual sex has been a part of our culture for so long we don’t even question its permanence. But maybe you should, because according to a recent study, casual sex could be hurting you more than you think. OkCupid While casual sex itself doesn’t inherently have any negative health repercussions, things like improper condom use (specifically, not using it) or just using an unreliable form of birth control (non-condoms) can. Women often report giving in to impromptu sexual encounters because “we just had so much fun and [we] can’t remember the last time [we] felt this alive” — whether that’s true or not, sex definitely can make one feel more alive. But beyond being fun, the aforementioned studies suggest that casual sex could cause women to have irregular cycles — i.e. a crazy sex drive in the absence of a baby bump, as you’re not “properly” ovulating. Men too can experience a decrease in sperm production, but this is less severe. According to the study, men who have sex with strangers multiple times a week experience a decrease in fertility in as little as six weeks. Something else to keep in mind is that it has also been found that men who have sex with strangers report using condoms less frequently than those who have sex with a regular partner. What Are the Consequences of Casual Sex? It can be easy to get caught up in the high that comes with getting laid, but few of us account for the fact that casual sex is completely new for a lot of us. For starters, we don’t have the requisite social or medical knowledge we need to protect ourselves from repercussions, which include STDs and pregnancy.